At What Age Should You Start Thinking/Seriously Considering Getting Married?
Apr/01/2012 06:50 PM Filed in: Marriage Sex and Dating
This is not a one-size-fits-all question but here are some general principles to help.
First, be careful about capitulating to the cultural trap of education. Most parents encourage their children to complete their education before marriage. While that is a good idea, it is not an iron-clad rule. While you should complete high school, it is not inappropriate to get married before graduation from college or while in graduate school. The Bible tells us in 1 Corinthians 7 that it is better to marry than to burn with passion. In other words, it is better to get married and honor God than to live in a continual struggle with fornication because your education is not complete. More important than completing your degree is honoring God and the one you plan to marry. If you can not maintain abstinence, it is better to marry than wait and fornicate.
Young adults are biologically ready for marriage before they are out of school. Most young adults are also ready for marriage, when it comes to maturity, before they complete a lengthy educational process.
Many parents believe children should become financially independent before marriage. For some young adults, this is possible. Unfortunately, I know young couples that struggle with fornication because marrying would remove parental support for education and/or health insurance. This is unwise. Help your children honor God, don’t just help them finish their education. Of course, this is also an issue of faith. Will a young Christian couple marry and trust God to meet their needs because they made a choice to honor him? Unfortunately, many are not willing to trust God in this situation, in so doing, they forfeit a great opportunity to build their faith and have a story of how God proved faithful in their life.
Second, young men must realize that when they marry, they are not just marrying for sex. They are taking on the obligation of providing for a wife and future children. If a young man does not have a job and is not pursuing a productive life, he shouldn’t focus on fornicating. He should focus on self-control, abstinence, productivity and maturity. Too many young men are just boys using young women for sex rather than men who are willing to shoulder responsibility for a wife and children.
There is no universal age to begin pursuing marriage. Some are not ready for marriage until much later in life while others should begin thinking in this direction in their twenties.
First, be careful about capitulating to the cultural trap of education. Most parents encourage their children to complete their education before marriage. While that is a good idea, it is not an iron-clad rule. While you should complete high school, it is not inappropriate to get married before graduation from college or while in graduate school. The Bible tells us in 1 Corinthians 7 that it is better to marry than to burn with passion. In other words, it is better to get married and honor God than to live in a continual struggle with fornication because your education is not complete. More important than completing your degree is honoring God and the one you plan to marry. If you can not maintain abstinence, it is better to marry than wait and fornicate.
Young adults are biologically ready for marriage before they are out of school. Most young adults are also ready for marriage, when it comes to maturity, before they complete a lengthy educational process.
Many parents believe children should become financially independent before marriage. For some young adults, this is possible. Unfortunately, I know young couples that struggle with fornication because marrying would remove parental support for education and/or health insurance. This is unwise. Help your children honor God, don’t just help them finish their education. Of course, this is also an issue of faith. Will a young Christian couple marry and trust God to meet their needs because they made a choice to honor him? Unfortunately, many are not willing to trust God in this situation, in so doing, they forfeit a great opportunity to build their faith and have a story of how God proved faithful in their life.
Second, young men must realize that when they marry, they are not just marrying for sex. They are taking on the obligation of providing for a wife and future children. If a young man does not have a job and is not pursuing a productive life, he shouldn’t focus on fornicating. He should focus on self-control, abstinence, productivity and maturity. Too many young men are just boys using young women for sex rather than men who are willing to shoulder responsibility for a wife and children.
There is no universal age to begin pursuing marriage. Some are not ready for marriage until much later in life while others should begin thinking in this direction in their twenties.