This is a huge issue. Restoration will not happen overnight. It needs prayer and patience to rebuild the broken trust. Sometimes you need someone beside yourselves, like a pastor or elder, to help walk you though this.

One very important thing to remember is that it is not hopeless. God can heal us from anything and we know couples who have worked through some pretty amazing things and come out on the other side. They totally love each other and walk with the Lord. God wants to heal marriages no matter what the sin done to one another and sexual sin is no different.

This kind of situation still takes time to fix. There must be confession where we admit that we were wrong. We tell the person and the spouse that what we’ve done was wrong. Then there is repentance, which is a change of heart and mind so there’s a change of action. Then there is reconciliation which is learning to build trust. This all takes time.

Sometimes the worst thing is when Christians just say, they forgive each other, don’t deal with the hurt, and they attempt to move on. Sexual sin damages the very foundation of a marriage. A couple needs to begin again and lay a new foundation in their marriage. That doesn’t mean they need to get divorced. It means they need to start over, go back to the basics of Christ and the basics of their commitment to one another.

If this is something you have gone through, please talk to one of the pastors or elders before you leave. We would like to help. We can also connect you with professional counseling to help you rebuild.