“Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate” Matthew 19:6 NKJV

God says He hates divorce.

“I hate divorce,” says the Lord God of Israel,…” Malachi 2:16a

The following explanation operates on the following assumptions:

1. The Bible is the Word of God, inerrant, infallible, and authoritatively binding in every age and culture on earth.
2. The Bible is to be interpreted literally and straightforwardly unless the context clearly indicates that it should be taken otherwise.
3. More specifically related to the issue of divorce and remarriage, it is assumed that whenever God grants permission for a legitimate divorce, He also grants permission for a legitimate remarriage. Therefore, since in some cases God does permit divorce, it is assumed that wherever He does, He also permits remarriage.

“A wife is not to depart from her husband. But if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife” 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 NKJV

The principles here are very clear:

1. No divorce is permitted for a Christian couple.
2. Separation is allowed in severe circumstances (e.g. physical cruelty or abuse, life threats, etc.) but never divorce and remarriage. There is only one exception to this principle.

“Whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced (i.e. for any reason other than sexual immorality) commits adultery.” Matthew 5:32 NKJV

Since sexual relations form a bond of oneness between two people…

“Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.” 1 Corinthians 6:16

Sexual sin on the part of one marriage partner is grounds for divorce. The Greek word translated “sexual immorality” (pornea) is a general term and would include adultery, homosexuality or any type of sexual perversion. It should be noted that Jesus does not insist upon divorce in such cases nor command it – nor even encourage it. Considering the Scriptures as a whole, it would seem that divorce should be a last resort, reserved only for cases of repeated and/or flagrant sexual violations. Short of this, forgiveness and reconciliation are to be sought and the marriage preserved. If a divorce is obtained because of sexual immorality, remarriage is permitted.

II. DIVORCE BETWEEN A BELIEVER AND AN UNBELIEVER

The Bible speaks directly to this kind of situation…

“But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to dwell with him, let him not divorce her. And the woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to dwell with her, let her not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. 1 Corinthians 7:12-16

The principles here are also very clear:

1. If the unbelieving partner desires to preserve the marriage, the believing partner has no freedom to divorce him/her.
2. If the unbelieving partner chooses to leave and sue for divorce, the believing partner is to let him/her depart. In such cases, the believing partner is free to remarry, but only another Christian “someone who belongs to the Lord.”

“A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.” 1 Corinthians 7:39

III. SPECIAL CONSIDERATIONS

Every situation does not fit neatly into these categories. There are a number of varied situations that can arise. Many are of such a unique nature that general principles cannot be formulated for them. However, there are a few special cases that tend to reoccur, and these are considered below:

1. When any divorce is obtained on non-biblical grounds, and one of the parties remarries, that person has committed adultery since God never recognized the divorce as legitimate.

” But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.” Matthew 5:32

“He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.” Mark 10:11

Since the remarried partner has “committed adultery,” the marriage bond is now broken and the remaining partner is free to remarry.

1. In the case of a person who has just accepted Christ as his/her Savior, that person becomes a “new creation” in Christ.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone,
the new has come!” 2 Corinthians 5:17

This does not mean God immediately erases all painful memories, bad habits or underlying causes of past marital problems, but that He begins the process of transforming the believer through the Holy Spirit and the Word of God. Nor does this mean that the new believer is automatically freed from all responsibility for his actions before becoming a Christian. In fact, a sign of true saving faith will be a desire to obey what God has said about marriage and divorce in the Bible:

1. If the new believer is presently separated from his/her spouse, he/she must seek genuine reconciliation with the estranged partner

“But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.” 1 Corinthians 7:11

If the partner refuses, and seeks and receives a divorce, the believer is free to remarry in the Lord according to

“But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.” 1 Corinthians 7:15

1. If the new believer is presently divorced, he/she must seek genuine reconciliation with the divorced partner

“But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.” 1 Corinthians 7:11

If the partner refuses, the believer is free to remarry in the Lord.

“But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.” 1 Corinthians 7:15

1. If the new believer is presently divorced and his/her former spouse has since remarried, the marriage bond has been broken and the new believer is free to remarry in the Lord. To have the remarried partner obtain a second divorce to reconcile with the new believer would be a violation of the Scriptures

1. If the new believer’s former spouse has remarried and is now divorced again, the new believer is not allowed to take the former spouse back but is allowed to remarry in the Lord.

1. If the new believer is presently remarried, but his/her original divorce was not biblical, he/she should not dissolve the present marriage to seek reconciliation with the former partner. To do so would be a violation of the Scriptures. The new believer should confess his/her sin, receive God’s forgiveness, and make his/her present marriage honoring to God.

1. It is assumed that the grace of God becomes operative in any attempt to reconcile a marriage. Two people who repent, confess their sin, and seek God’s power and strength, can once again experience the joy of a healthy marriage relationship. A true sign of repentance and salvation will be a sincere desire to restore a former marriage whenever possible.

1. If the innocent party in a legitimate, biblical divorce is seeking remarriage, it is preferable that he/she wait until a spouse who is unwilling to reconcile has remarried. The purpose of such a wait is so as not to preclude any possibility of reconciliation. However, this is not to be a hard and fast rule, but will depend upon a number of factors that must be evaluated by each person in such a situation (e.g. purity of life and thought, time, children needing a father/mother, etc.)